Countdown to True Blood: Season Two, Part One

Season two begins right where we left off: Tara, Sookie, and Andy are all staring at the dead person’s foot hanging out of his car. Oh, and the girls are screaming their heads off. Tara is immediately afraid that it might be Lafayette’s and Andy tries to find a pulse – until he notices that the body doesn’t have a heart, so therefore no pulse. It is soon discovered that the body is Miss Jeanette, the voodoo woman who gave exorcisms, and that her real name is Nancy.

Tara does everything to keep her mother, Lettie Mae, from finding out about her fake exorcist for fear that her mother will relapse, but her mother still believes the woman to be her savior.

Lafayette is being held captive in a creepy basement with several other people, including AIDS burger Royce. When it is finally revealed that Eric was holding Lafayette all along, Royce pulls out a silver necklace and tries to escape. This only angers Eric and he eats Royce, before ripping his body into pieces. Eric is pretty disgruntled about getting blood in his hair (which happens to be riddled with aluminum foil) and takes Lafayette upstairs to meet Pam and to question Lafayette about Eddie (the vampire that Amy killed last season).

When Lafayette tries to escape, Ginger shoots him in the leg and proceeds to scream a lot. Fearful that he will die, Lafayette tries to convince Eric to turn him into a badass vampire. Instead, they decide to start eating him.

We finally learn how Sam knows Maryann, and boy it’s weird. When he was seventeen, he would turn into a dog and sneak into houses and steal valuables. Well, he just so happens to break into the wrong house and meets Maryann, while he’s standing there butt naked. They, oddly enough, have sex where she starts doing that weird static in and out thing, and Sam runs off while she’s in the shower, nabbing all of the money she had hidden in her dresser drawer.

He assumes that Maryann has returned for money, so he offers up a full garbage bag one night. She laughs and confesses that she isn’t here for him. She comes back the next day and sits in a booth, ordering many, many entrées. When she gets up and dances, after Sam just finished discussing with Andy that when he opened the bar he wanted a place where people didn’t feel the need to dance, the whole bar enters this blissful, partying state where they finally start to get a bit crazy. Oh, and their eyes turn a bit black.

She throws a pool party with some mysterious soup that makes everyone crazy again—there’s even some boobs. Andy shows up and sees the giant pig in a little play house, but when he asks her about her permit for the pig? He turns around and it has disappeared. Maryann convinces Andy to join in on the party, and it really doesn’t take much doing.

Eggs and Tara start to get really close, but Eggs gets a little too dirty with some random message therapist and Tara storms out. The next morning, she decides to take Sookie up on her offer and decides to move in with her.

Jason has decided to join the Fellowship of Light church and goes off to church camp to get in his summer-filled brainwashing. He gets pretty close to Steve Newlin, and especially Steve’s wife Sarah.

He’s asked to join the Elite Spiritual Army (vampire killers in the name of God) and is invited to stay in the Newlin’s home, the only member to be asked. The boys in his class begins to tease him about Sarah Newlin, because all she wants is his body.

Bill’s new “daughter,” Jessica, convinces Sookie to drive her out to her parent’s house – just for a look. She can’t help herself and runs to the house, with what started as a happy family reunion turns into an angry Jessica tired of being pushed around by her parents. Bill angrily crashes, glamoring Jessica’s little sister into inviting him in. We never get to see it, but apparently Bill glamored Jessica’s family “within an inch of their sanity” and they all piled into the car to head back to Bon Temps. Until Sookie finally gets upset enough to get out of the car and stomps away, claiming she’d rather walk the next twenty miles than listen to him.

Well, something attacks her, of course! She’s got these HUGE claw marks down her back and Bill can’t heal her with his vampire blood, so he takes her to some weird old lady doctor at Fangtasia. She’s healed! The next morning, she reads Ginger’s thoughts and finds out that Lafayette is locked down in the basement. Don’t worry! He’s still alive, just lying in his own filth.

Sookie makes a deal with Eric, and Lafayette goes home and cries.

Sam’s new waitress, Daphne, is a total ditz. She can’t remember the table numbers, constantly drops and spills things, and comes up short on her orders. Sam is off skinning dipping in the lake when Daphne shows up and decides to hop in and join him. When she takes her shirt off? She’s got the same kind of scratches on her back that Sookie had, only hers are scars.

This is a good opportunity to mention the music that plays in the end credits. Not only does it have something to do with the episode theme, “Scratches,” but every episode is titled after the song in the credits.

Hoyt has been a sweetheart since the series began, always trying to be respectful to women and polite to everyone. Except no one seems to really notice him – until now. Jessica, left alone to her own devices, ventures into Merlotte’s for a Tru Blood when Hoyt asks to join her. They go back to Jessica’s place, where Bill walks in on them making out and angrily throws Hoyt out.

Miss Jeanette’s body is finally studied and she has the same mysterious scratches. These scratches are highly poisonous and were already compared to a komodo dragon’s scratches. The poison begins to break down the victim’s nervous system and renders them paralyzed, which is when Jeanette’s heart was removed.

As Sookie’s in Texas seeking information for Eric, Maryann throws a surprise party for Tara. While everyone’s off having a fantastic time, Maryann wanders off and begins holding her hands in the air and talking in another language. Her hands turn into huge claws, just like the creature that attacked Sookie!

Everyone at the party starts to get naked and restless, putting their faces in cake and then punching each other while Tara and Eggs finally hook up.

Jessica has ordered a late night snack and the man who brought him, Barry, reads Sookie’s mind. When Sookie confronts him about it not being a coincidence, he realizes that she read his mind and runs away. She finally catches up, but he’s reluctant to talk about it and begs Sookie to not tell any of the scary vampires about him.

Sam and Daphne get closer at Tara’s party, where she informs him that not only does she know what he is, but she is also a shifter. They have an awkward encounter with Terry and Arlene, who have also snuck out into the woods for some frisky activity. Arlene just grins and says, “it’s in the air.”

The next day, Maryann decides that she’s moving into Sookie’s with Tara, but Tara says no. To get Tara back on her side, Maryann works some kind of magic at Merlotte’s to piss Tara off, making her tell everyone to “f*ck off” and run back to Maryann for comfort. She then invites Maryann to move into Sookie’s, even though Sookie is away in Dallas.

Sookie, unaware of Jason being a member, decides to infiltrate the Fellowship of the Sun to try to find the Dallas vampire sheriff Godric. It is then revealed that Eric’s maker was, in fact, Godric and that is why he was so adamant to find him. Sookie learns that Barry quit his job after their confrontation.

If you enjoyed Amanda’s review, you can find the rest of her work right HERE on Sci-Fi Bloggers. You can also follow her on Twitter @ErukaMoseley.

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