LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, may I have your attention, please?! You’ve been patient! You’ve been diligent! You’ve been loyal! Now, for demonstrating such tremendous qualities, such incredible attributes, such unbelievable resolve, you shall be rewarded! Friends, bloggers, Earthlings, lend me your ears! The time has come, yet again, for you to get your proper dose of excitement, adventure, and intrigue! People of the Net, without further delay, I present to you this week’s FRRRRRRRRRRIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY FICTIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!
…Sam, play it.
*Cue music.*
“Hello, everyone! I’ve been so busy getting fiction ready for all you lovely readers that I’ve gotten a bit behind on my Christmas shopping. So, to round out the year, I’ll be leaving you in the capable hands of Brandon Scott.”
*The Fictionmonger then bows and steps to the side. Brandon Scott walks in from off-screen.*
“Hello, I hope you’re all having a better December than most of 2020. I’m looking forward to New Year’s as much as anyone—but there’s a few things left to do.
“And one of them is Christmas. I love Christmas – like, a lot. And, though I know I’m kind of known for writing dark stuff, I figured we could all use some cheer. So, I’ve written a story with no monsters, no evil, and only a touch of magic. I hope you like this first part as much as I liked writing it.
“Stay warm out there, everyone!”
…tuning out.
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